So, all was going well, the swelling on my ankle was very slowly starting to disappear when… OUCH!!! I DID AGAIN… On my first morning walk in two weeks, as I enter Trumper Park, it goes on me. I fall to the ground and hit hard. F**K.
I stand up and hobble toward my apartment. I feel faint. The world is spinning. My vision is closing in. I have to stop. I sit on the curb. Then try again. A few steps later I sit. Finally, somehow, I make it home.
My friend takes me to a physio. It’s not broken, thank God, but I have done some pretty serious ligament damage. I get a nice boot to walk around in for the next few days. At least finally I’m getting it cared for I guess.
I want something to cheer me up. I deserve something to cheer me up. Decafe coffee doesn’t count does it?
‘Mmmm mmmm!’ I say as I take a sip. ‘Decafe is actually really good, after not having any coffee for ten days.’
‘Argh.. hmm…’ my friend says as she sips hers. ‘I’m not sure yours is decafe,’ she says, having ordered a regular. She is right – hers tastes watery. Mine tastes good. But she has added sugar to hers… ‘What do you want, sugar or caffeine?’ she laughs.
‘I’ve already had a few sips… and… I’m really enjoying this,’ I say, feeling like a drug addict getting his first hit in years.
And that was my tenth day of detox.
And I had been going so well…
Day six I woke up again at 620am. What’s with that? Full of energy. I’m not complaining. I get up and started writing. I have cravings for anything. I have temptations, especially when people talk about coffee and when I get a good whiff of it. God it smells good. But no desire to cave in.
I believe the only sugar I’ve really eaten these last ten days is honey, a lot of honey. The only drug that might also have taken in is the pott that sometimes whifts into my room from somewhere in my neighbourhood… particularly effective when breathed in while practicing yoga. Yes, feeling a bit spacey. Strange.
I go to bed around 1am, and wake on the seventh day at 8am, full of energy, excited to start the day. It’s raining. I do 20 minutes of yoga and eat breakfast and get into some writing. I am feeling lighter. Much lighter.
And so on… and so on…
So. I lasted ten days, but it wasn’t my fault. Now I am an invalid in a ski boot. That’s not where I was supposed to be by now.
I haven’t given up altogether. I’m going to keep going besides today’s slip up. When you fall of the horse…